His Honest Eyes
by xElleCorrupted
Summary: WARNING: INCEST! MalexMale yaoi. Lemon. Summary: There's more to the Heiwajima brother's than just brotherly love.
1. Chapter 1

We're brothers. What we do is wrong, I know that.

He knows it, too.

Whenever we're alone in the same room, he watches me. I think he notices that I realize it – there's not much that can go by me. That's okay, I suppose, because I do the same.

I can tell he knows I do.

Those eyes of his – aren't we suppose to be identical in some way? When he looks at me, I can't look away. He has no emotional expressions yet they are all visible through those brown, half-closed orbs. No one notices it, not even our parents. Why am I able to? Is it some sort of sibling thing?

It all started when we were kids. I had no one else to protect other than my little brother.

At least, that's how I saw it.

Kasuka would bluntly say a thank you whenever I did something for him, and every time I would shake my head and give him a whisper for a response.

"Don't."

"Why, oniichan?" He would ask, curiosity lurking in his words even if it didn't show in his face. Yet again, those damn eyes and how they spoke for themselves…

I would look at him and give him a special smile, one that would only ever be seen by Kasuka himself. No one else deserved it anyway.

"Because," I spoke so only he could hear, and I'd place my hand ontop of his head, feeling the brown locks that were similar to mine at that time, "I love you. Whatever I do is for you and I don't need you to thank me."

Kasuka nodded once, and he would stand on his tip-toes to give me a small peck on the cheek. I shouldn't have ever allowed this to begin. This gesture; as much as we told ourselves mentally that it was innocent – it wasn't.

He meant more to it than just a kiss on the cheek.

Every time, I would move my head just a-little, so the kiss would travel closer to somewhere that shouldn't even be touched. Yet, I wanted to feel his childish lips against mine. The longing we had for each other back then was painful but we both knew we had to wait.

_Wait_, I kept telling myself, even when we began sleeping in the same bed and holding each other too tight or too close for any mother's liking.

Now the Heiwajima brother's were adults and no longer children.

We were not innocent when we had to seem to be.

Kasuka was an actor so he was always traveling, though when he was home for break and holidays, he was an animal.

I was an animal.

"_N-ngh_, Sh..._oniichan_," Kasuka moaned softly, digging his fingers into the crimpled and messy blankets. He made not a single facial expression, only closing his eyes and forming his lips into a small 'o.' This did not count as an expression from him, because there was just nothing there. Blank.

He looked almost like a corpse.

I continued to plumage my tongue inside his entrance, the heat practically overwhelming me. I could feel his inner walls clamping around my tongue and his legs tightening around my neck. Flicking the tip as far as I could go, I knew I didn't have the length to touch the spot that would make him see stars, but for now it was enough to tease and drive him crazy.

"I-I can't..!" Even without touching him, Kasuka whimpered loudly as he came for the second time, spilling his seed over his lean stomach. His inner walls tightened further around my pink muscle and I had to retreat – any longer and I would have came myself.

Damn male hormones.

Unable to help the tiny smirk forming on my lips, I leaned down, licking up a small spot of cum from his chest even if it was cringe-worthy.

"You liked that?" I asked, once again surprised from my unusual husky voice though I kept my posture.

Kasuka panted softly, eventually opening his eyes that showed nothing more than desire. Nodding slowly, he held his arms out and I immediately gave in, wanting to be held in his arms and hold him in mine.

He was the only one I felt confident with that I could hold without feeling like I might break him. These arms of mine; that flea called me a monster because of them.

Is it true? Or am I only a monster because of this forbidden love I share between my own flesh and blood?

"What are you thinking?" Kasuka whispered, running his gentle fingers through my bleached hair. I looked down at him, running my own to trace the lines of his face that defined his beauty and child-like features. It was almost like his body was the only thing that symbolized he was an adult.

Shaking my head, I partially lied with a grunt, "I was thinking about how much I love you."

There really was no point in lying to him. He could tell I was lying before I was even able speak the untruthful words.

Like he was reading my mind, which was most likely possible, Kasuka held me tighter as he disagreed, "That's only half true. What's wrong, oniichan?"

I sighed, resting my forehead against his, pondering whether I should reply with words or actions.

Contemplating, I ended up replying, "Don't call me that."

Kasuka's eyes widened only a-little, ceasing the movements of his fingers and causing me to feel guilty for scolding.

"What word? Oniich-"

"Yes," I interrupted though I kept my voice softer than I had before. "_That_. Sorry."

I kissed his forehead so he would know it was alright and that he didn't do anything wrong. He shook his head, taking me by surprise when he took my chin in-between his two fingers and kissed me gently, wetting my top lip with the tip of his tongue. Before I could kiss back, he pulled away, only to hug me tightly.

"I apologize, Shizuo," Kasuka whispered into my ear, and I winced when I felt the contact of his teeth against my earlobe.

I responded by leaning my head down and placing butterfly kisses across his collarbone, his groan encouraging me further.

"Say it again," I whispered, wanting to hear his voice say my name over and over again.

"S-Shizuo…," Kasuka repeated, his lips ghosting over my earlobe, causing me to shiver in anticipation.

Blame the damn hormones, but I couldn't take it anymore. I needed and wanted him, and it had to be now.

I held my two fingers in front of Kasuka's mouth and without needing to explain my intentions; he took them in and began to suck, coating them with his saliva. Just the sight of it was so amazingly erotic I couldn't help but grind my hips against his so my groin wouldn't feel as neglected.

"Kasuka," I groaned, taking out my fingers from the warmth of his mouth and poking his entrance with one. Before I could thrust it inside, he quickly spoke, "Go slow, please…"

I knew I couldn't take things as fast as we wanted to; it had been too long since our last encounter. Yet those urges…

They were so fucking hard to control.

"I will," I assured him, taking my time to slip the digit inside; it was much easier access since he was relaxed and I rewarded him with a gentle kiss. Thrusting the single finger in and out, I watched as Kasuka circled his hips slowly, trying to adjust to the intruder. A small sound escaped his lips, and was held in the air.

He sounded beautiful with every quickening gasp or pant, every moan that escaped those precious lips made me drown in my own type of ecstasy.

_Yes_, I know.

I'm going to hell.

"Shi..zuo..!" Kasuka gasped loudly, arching his back ever so slightly when I abused his hole in the kindest way with another finger.

I knew he was tight, but if I didn't get at least three fingers in…

"Shh," I cooed, wetting my lips with his tears as I kissed them away.

With eyes half lidded, he looked at me and nodded once, though I don't know to what, whether it was to me trying to soothe him or if he agreed I had to go further.

"N-ngh!"

God, I love this man.

He wasn't even a child anymore. It honestly baffled me that we could've waited so long.

I tried searching for that spot that would make him beg for me in screams and when his fists grabbed at the covers and twisted them, I knew I had finally found it.

"O-oh, fuck! Shizuo…Shizuo, t-there!" He screamed, throwing his head back and exposing that pale, eye-watering neck of his. I leaned down to bite a mark I had already made, meanwhile I continued to thrust my two digits in and out, repeatedly hitting that same spot, "You mean here?"

Kasuka nodded his quivering head, panting heavily as he tried to keep his hips in place, not wanting to move and suddenly his brother would lose his movements.

I knew I should have entered yet another finger, but I couldn't last any longer. I could feel my member leaking precum onto Kasuka's stomach, and just the feel of his skin contact to my erection was too much for me to handle.

Taking my fingers out with a wet pop, I smothered my hand in Kasuka's and my precum, lathering it on my cock as quickly as possible. Adjusting myself at his entrance, I waited as I looked down at him, knowing I could only go in when he gave me the signal.

I needed that _god-damn motherfucking_ signal.

"S-Shizuo…," Kasuka whispered, placing his shaking hands on my shoulders, bringing me down to his face and I stared at his lips for a moment, wanting not only to hear but to read what he had to say. His words were just that precious to me.

"Yes?" I replied softly, even though there was no need to. He needed to hear my voice as much as I needed to hear his own.

Kasuka traced my shoulder to my face slowly, leaving a burning touch behind on my skin as his finger went. Cupping my cheek with that hand, he brushed his lips against mine, a feeling I can never in my life explain.

"I love you, Shizuo."

There it was.

In a swift of a movement of a hip, I began to enter him slowly enough where it couldn't bring so much pain, yet fast enough that I could finally be relieved. We gasped at the same time, our mouth inches apart, and our breath's quickened in a way that would have made it seem there was a lack of oxygen in the room.

"I needed you so bad," I groaned, keeping my hips still as I placed my lips against his, and as a response he tightened his inner walls around my cock, and for a moment I thought I would literally pass out.

Kasuka noticed, easing up and I mumbled something I couldn't even comprehend myself, my brain turning into nothing but mush as it concentrated on that wonderful, unbelievable tight heat. It was like a drug to me – I could never get enough of it but I would always ask myself if I could even handle it.

Fuck it – it felt good and I was going to get as much of it as I wanted.

No limits, no restrictions.

"_Nng_, _Shizuo-oniichan_..," Kasuka panted, unaware of what he just called me, and at that point I knew he didn't do it on purpose. A pure habit that I would get rid of with time.

My hips were faster than my mind, thrusting before I had meant to. My hand snaked its way up the writhing body and entangled itself in natural brown locks, and I could feel him shaking with each slam against a certain spot that even sent me in thrills because it only meant more heat.

"F-fuck me..fuck me har..harder…"

Said man moaned sweetly into my ear and it only encouraged me further to thrust harder than the last time. Each time I made sure I wouldn't miss his prostate even if it meant we would be closer to climax.

I needed this damn release more than anything.

Kasuka's nails dug deep into my shoulder blades and I grunted into his neck, giving him the same painful pleasure as I bit harshly, sure to leave another intended mark.

"D-damn..Shizuo! Shizuo!"

"K-Kasuka…"

With one more perfectly angled thrust, I pulled out completely before slamming back in, and when I hit his prostate I instantly saw white.

Kasuka screamed in relief pleasure, holding onto my back as if it were his only option left and came in-between our chests. Once those tight walls wrapped around my member unbearably, I had had enough and climaxed inside him, filling him to the brim.

When cleaned, we cuddled in the silent afterglow, his head on my chest and my arm wrapped around him tightly, our fingers entwined with our free hand. It was a long moment before a word was spoken.

"Shizuo?"

"Mm?"

"…I'm sorry, I think I called you onii- that word you dislike - in the moment."

I smiled and shook my head, running my thumb over his knuckle soothingly, replying softly, "It's okay. You don't need to apologize."

He shifted slightly, and I suppose it was because he knew I would reply like that but probably expected something differently.

"Shizuo?"

"Yes, Kasuka?"

"I love you. I know I'm not always here to show you that, but I really do. I promise that whenever I'm with you, I'll let you know just how much I love you because I do, with all my heart."

Kasuka kept his promise – and like the way he had held onto me that night, I held onto those words with my own dear life. 

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><p>Okokokok.<p>

So this idea popped up when I saw an episode of Durarara and Kasuka popped up out of no where, staring at Shizuo and they both nodded at eachother before he (Kasuka) departed. Forgot the episode number, but you could tell a silent message had just gone between them, and I felt like Shizuo knew his brother better than anyone else, even though he was…physically emotionless in ze face. O_o;

NEVERTHESLUTTYLESS. I loved writing this even though it took me MONTHS. Seriously, I've had this in my documents since July. Thank freakin' goodness I finished today. I meant to upload this looooong ago but no inspiration came to me. Every now and then it did, but it would go away as instantly as it came. So yeah. ENJOY IT NAO AND NO COMPAINTS, MMK? Mmk.

Lol, kidding, complain all you want you greedy bastards. d:

This isn't a Shizaya fic, but there will be one not sooooon, but it's in the making. Lawls.

Hope you guys enjoyed this and please review.

Your reviews are like my drugs. Like Kasuka's anus is to Shizuo. There's just something hawt about brotherly love.  
>Lololololololol, okay, I'll stoooop. Kthxbai. C:<p>

See you guys soon! – Hopefully! Enjoy your Thanksgiving this year! :3


	2. Chapter 2: Bloodstream

Chapter: 2

PLEASE READ! I just realized how short this is. I'm so sorry. I thought it would be longer, silly me.. I'll make something better soon, or probably replace this chapter in a few days or weeks with more yummy details. :c

Inspiration song: Bloodstream -Stateless.

A/N: OH. I'm back with another chapter, woohoo. No, I was not planning on making another until about a month or so ago when I had nothing to do and was looking over the story and I really couldn't help myself. I thought it'd be nice for another chapter, and who knows, maybe a third one will come soon..? LOL IDK. NO KILLIN' ME IF THERE ISN'T, PLZ KTHX. I hate making promises and such when it comes to actual stories, because I always tend to break them, lol.

Anyway. I'm happy I haven't gotten negative reviews for pairing these two up. I thought I'd get beat up or something by now, lol...Let me just make this clear: I do NOT believe in actual incest. However, as long as it's in story, iz okay, no? ;D No harm done. If you don't like it, don't force yourself to read it. Mainly 'cause I don't want to hear what ignorant things you have to say. So,

READER.

READER STOP.

READER, STAHP IT.

LOL couldn't help myself. But seriously. For the love of all that's good and mighty, DO NOT READ IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT. Whether you don't like malexmale relationships, reading about sex or incest, please go ahead and click the X button now. I love all reviews, but only if it has an actual **purpose** and _not _flaminga story just because you don't like a pairing or yaoi.

I also want to add a little bit about Beast Fiction...

Many of you are going to want to virtually slap me but I have lost my inspiration for that wonderful story. I went to edit it and such since it was somewhat finished, but I found the writing to be so boring and couldn't upload it for you guys to read it. I'd be ashamed. Hopefully one day I'll continue it. Not sure when though. I'm starting college classes this year while finishing up my senior year in high school and I'm going to be soooo busy. I also have online classes topped to that. It's going to be a very tough year. I'll try writing whenever I get the chance and updating, I promise.

Okay, so I won't stop you from reading any longer. Though again, thank you for everyone who has been giving me wonderful reviews and positivity. It means more than you can imagine. Keep them coming and I might, again, make a third chapter.

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><p>I awoke to my cell phone ringing and growled. Who the hell would be calling at this time of the morning, damnit? I reached towards the nightstand, grabbing the little fucker and placing it beside my ear after flipping it open. My voice sounded hoarse as I answered, "Hello?"<p>

"Finally, you pick up. Do you have any idea what time it is, asshole? Well, it's practically three. The hell have you been?"

"Fuck Tom, I'm sorry. I didn't realize," I sighed, placing a hand on my forehead and spoke again, "I have no work today though, remember? I'm with my...little brother."

I could hear Tom curse and could almost imagine him rolling his eyes as he said, "I know that. You were supposed to meet me up at the bar for afternoon drinks with him. Are we still up for that or what?"

I glanced over at the boy beside me as he stirred in his sleep slightly, and shook my head even though Tom couldn't see me, "Can't, sorry. I don't think Kasuka would want to go out anymore. He...came home late last night and he's pretty tired."

What Tom didn't know would not hurt him.

The male over the phone groaned, "Who cares? Wake his ass up as tell him the booze will eventually kick in and he'll be up and runnin' around in no time. Come on, I've been waiting for like, two hours."

"Sorry. I don't want to go anyway myself, in case the flea will be there. I want to spend as much time with Kasuka before he leaves on his next trip, and would rather not waste it by throwing vending machines at that asshole."

"We're going to be at another part of Ikebukuro, so you don't have to worry!"

"No, Tom," I rejected, rubbing my face slowly, "Look, I'll call you if anything, alright? Maybe we'll change our minds later. Goodbye."

"Don't you fucking hang up on me you da-" I turned off the phone, shutting it down afterwards, not really up to hearing Tom's voice at a time like this. I looked back at my lover and smiled faintly, his face still in peace as he was asleep. He looked like an angel, as corny as that sounded, but it's true.

Sometimes I wish he could stay with me, and we'd have days like this; me waking up to him with bed hair (or sex hair) and without a care in the world.

Yet, for now that seemed unlikely and practically impossible with the rate of how his career was going. He was an A-listed celebrity and he was getting more and more famous each and every day.

How he could manage the pressure, I didn't understand. I barely could keep up with my own simple, commoner jobs.

"Kasuka," I whispered, slowly stroking my thumb against his cheek. Kasuka didn't budge abit at neither my voice nor touch. This was usual of him; he had always been a deep sleeper. Sometimes I wondered what he was dreaming in that mind of his, for him to be in such a slumber.

I wish I was the same way, able to dream for as long as I could to be able to leave this rotten society for a few hours. Though, my dreams usually turned into nightmares', mostly of that fucking no life flea.

After a few minutes of silence, I propped myself onto an elbow, and tugged gently at his brunette locks while saying his name again, "Kasuka, it's time to wake up. We slept in."

I ceased my tugging once he moved his head slightly and slowly began to open his eyes. My breathing stopped for a moment as I realized how beautiful this was, to wake up to him like this without worry of being caught. Brown orbs stared into mine until he sat up slowly, stretching on his way.

A gulp of air was introduced to my lungs again.

"Slept in?" He asked quietly, running a hand through his hair almost in annoyance. Kasuka was never a morning person. I almost felt guilty for waking him up. He probably had to get up during unbelievable times to travel and work on his television productions and movies.

Damn, I'm awful.

"Yes," I nodded, sitting up with him and I smiled as he leaned against me, causing me to wrap an arm around his shoulder as I spoke again, "It's already the afternoon. Did you have anything important to do today?"

"I do."

"Ah," I glanced down, mentally slapping myself in the head for turning off the alarm clock before we had gone to bed. I thought he didn't have work, though I must have been wrong.

"What did you need to do today? Maybe you can call your boss and explain to him you're sick or something."

Kasuka chuckled softly, and from the corner of my eyes I could have sworn he smiled a little.

"It has nothing to do with work. I meant that the important thing I had to do today was spend time with you, Shizuo."

My heart skipped a beat as I heard these words, and I couldn't help but smile like an idiot. He would never know how something like that could make me the happiest man of life. I leaned down, grasping his chin and turning his head to kiss his lips gently, holding him tighter against me. When I let him go, he looked up at me and said nothing.

"Do you want to stay in today?" I asked, taking an approach at worthless conversation. We both knew he couldn't go out, rarely, anyway. Not unless he wanted to get pounced on by a bunch of fan girls.

Kasuka nodded, placing a warm hand on my chest as he practically purred, "Lay down..."

Call me an idiot, but I really didn't know why he was asking such a question. His demeanor changed, and suddenly he looked hungry. It was when I looked into his eyes that I noticed it was pure lust.

I laid down quicker than I had ever done in my life.

"You don't need to do this if you don't want to, I wo-"

"I want to," was all he said, before Kasuka straddled my waist, leaning down slowly until our lips barely touched, hot breath escaping instead. I could tell he was planning on teasing.

Once our lips finally met, there was no hesitation whatsoever. I slipped my tongue into his mouth, practically turning into jello as I felt how his tongue danced around mine. He took the opportunity to suck on mine, and I groaned into his mouth in response. Pressing his crotch against mine, I couldn't help but buck my hips, my semi-erection brushing against his own and causing both of us to moan quietly. Kasuka pulled away, a string of saliva still connecting us until he broke it once he licked his lips slowly.

Fuck, he doesn't know what he does to me.

"Do that again," he ordered rather forcefully, and I obliged, grabbing onto his hips as I pushed upwards, our cocks rubbing in the process. His moan was anything but innocent, and I couldn't help but do it again, feeling the heat that almost overwhelmed me.

"Shizuo...," the raven moaned, throwing his head back as he began to thrust his hips forward slowly, grabbing onto both our cocks. I closed my eyes for a brief moment, the sensation of his touch just enough to make me go crazy. Kasuka noticed this and began to stroke our erections together, all the meanwhile rocking his hips back and forth.

"You're so goddamn sexy," I admitted in a groan, and with lidded eyes, Kasuka grabbed onto the headboard with his free hand, slowing his movements, his body seeming like a snake as he rocked his hips against me, obviously content with my compliment.

"I want you to fuck me. Not make love to me like yesterday, but I want you to fuck me," Kasuka murmured however, loud enough for me to clearly hear. He was different today. I don't know why he woke up this way, but he was different. It didn't bother me in the slightest, though. Infact, I don't think I've ever wanted him as much as I did now.

"Turn around," I practically growled, and he did so, showing me his bottom with absolute no shame. I grabbed his ass cheeks, spreading them apart and dove in without warning. He hissed, though I wasn't sure if it was from pain or not. He wasn't exactly tight now, having been only a few hours since we had sex. I wiggled my tongue inside him, tasting all of him. I don't know why I loved this so much; to anyone, they would find this disgusting.

I suppose I just love him too much to care.

Kasuka moved his hips against my mouth, pushing my tongue in deeper as he moaned, "Oh _yes_, fuck me, Shizuo..."

I didn't realize I was panting hard until I felt his mouth on the head of my cock, not giving me any warning as I did to him. I stopped breathing, groaning into his hole and causing slight vibration, which made him shiver in response, moaning, "Keep going, don't stop."

How can I say no to that?

My tongue from then on had a mind of its own as it wiggled inside him, not far enough to reach his favorite spot, though just enough to cause him to become a panting mess. Kasuka sucked hard whenever I thrusted my tongue, and I was to the point that I couldn't hold it in any longer.

I pulled out, giving his quivering hole a lick for good measure, and Kasuka whined as I did so, sighing softly, "No fingers, please, just get inside me..."

"I wasn't planning on using fingers," I murmured, my voice dripping with sex. I got on my knees, positioning myself behind it and pushed my cock deep inside him, deciding not to wait on reply.

He wanted rough, and I was going to give him exactly what he asked for. Fucking did not require being slow and gentle. I loved him, but there were times where we just needed this. Hard, quick, and a could-care-less attitude. These usually happened when the time for him to leave was coming near.

Kasuka yelled, arching his back rather beautifully, throwing his head back, eyes shut tightly. I took this moment to grab his hair, beginning to pound into him, and he moaned incoherent words as I did so. He eventually joined me, pushing his hips back to meet mine, and all you could hear in the room was panting, moaning, occasional growls and the slapping of skin.

"Fa..ahh..fast..er.._shit_!" Kasuka hissed when I hit his sweet spot, tightening his walls onto my member, causing me to yank his hair in return.

"Loosen up, damnit," I growled near his ear, slowing my pace until he cooperated, giving me room to move again. He moaned loudly as I quickened my pace and grabbed his erection, where I found his own hand already working himself. I couldn't help but let out a shaky chuckle, wrapping my hand around his and helping him pump his cock to the pace of my thrusts, meanwhile using my teeth to bite the side of his neck. I broke skin slightly, though lapped up the small amount of blood, in which he groaned my name.

Fuck it.

I had to release, _now_.

"Kasuka, I'm close," I grumbled, trailing my tongue over to his earlobe and biting it gently. I released my hand from his hair, sure he was going to have a headache later, and used it to grab his hip, hard enough to leave a bruise. My hand was slightly wet, indicating he was also close as well.

"Mmm," was all he said, too caught up in the moment for actual words. It only took a few more thrusts after that until he released, and I soon followed.

He yelled my name, and I yelled his.

The moment was of pure bliss, until I remembered that in a matter of days he would have to leave again and the cycle would begin again.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N

I deeply apologize. I always apologize whenever I create a story and leave it for months, sometimes even years on end before updating it, if I ever do it. My inspiration lacks to the point where I've almost deleted everything, but I realized I couldn't do that to my lovely readers. Thank you for the reviews and for the kindness you all have showed me. I am so undeserving! Much love!

Please enjoy this new chapter! I'm sure you all will love it!

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><p>It didn't take long for us to get tired after a couple rounds of our morning <em>activities<em>. While Kasuka was showering, I took it up on myself to make us our lunch. My cooking skills were not exactly restaurant worthy, but at least it was edible. Opening the refrigerator, the only items that were inside was a carton of strawberry milk, and eggs that have probably gone rotten.

"Damnit," I murmured.

How could I forget to buy groceries before Kasuka came? Closing the door to the fridge, I let my fingers slide through my hair as I walked over to the bathroom, knocking once before entering. Steam immediately came out of the room, and for a minute, I stood there practically blinded from it. Hot showers were always unusually uncomfortable for me, but for some reason Kasuka enjoyed it immensely, to the point that I would have to ask him to come out before he could faint in there.

"Going to come in and join me?" Kasuka asked, his silhouette figure seen through the curtains. I eyed his hand as it traveled from his chest slowly down to his hip.

Fuckin' _tease_.

Letting out a quiet chuckle, I shook my head even though I was sure he couldn't see me through all of this steam. "No, but I _do_ need to go to the supermarket. Forgot to buy some stuff, but I'll be back soon."

The shower curtain instantly rustled as Kasuka poked his head out, pushing his wet hair away from his face as he replied, "I'll come with you."

Hesitant, I eyed him carefully before I shook my head again, "No, stay here. You know how it can get with your fans and I don't want you to get jumped on just because of a couple of eggs and bread."

Kasuka glanced down before closing the curtain. I heard a soft sigh as he continued to wash himself, and my heart suddenly ached to hug him and hold him close. Being a celebrity was such a tough life and I didn't want him to not be able to feel normal. It hurt to see him have to stand all those autograph signings in the middle of him trying to act like a regular human being, but it hurt even more to have to tell him to stay home and see his reactions. At the end of the day, I believe we both knew he wasn't going to be able to live an ordinary life like I was doing – if you can even call it ordinary – and it was something we had silently accepted. Yet, watching his reaction just now couldn't have made me change my mind any quicker.

I bit my lip in thought before finally saying, "Fine, you can come. Just be in disguise or somethin'."

Immediately, my lover turned off the shower and I rushed out of the bathroom, closing the door behind me before I could see him naked. I heard a loud, "I'll be out in a minute," from him, and I smiled a bit at his enthusiasm to simply buy some food for the apartment. I stepped out of the bedroom so he could come out and grab whatever clothes he needed to get, and once he was back in the bathroom, I reentered, shouting out to him, "Don't be too long, okay?"

"Alright!"

I went over to the bed, staring down at the rustled sheets where we had made love too many times for me to count, no matter how cheesy that fuckin' sounded. I grabbed for a cigarette from the nightstand and pulled out the lighter from my back pocket, placing the cigarette in between my lips and lighting the bud, taking a long inhale. He hated it when I smoked in my apartment, but I couldn't help it.

It was nice to think that things were running smoothly for us, when in all reality they weren't. What was going on between us couldn't be explained to the world, and in the back of my mind, none of this could last forever. With his contract giving him some sort of leverage for now from the media over him not marrying yet, since it states that he isn't allowed to date while in contract with his company, it wouldn't be enough after it ends. He mentioned something before about renewing the contract if his company asked, but he couldn't renew it forever. We both knew that at this point, and I always have to think about his future and what's best for him every step we continue to take.

Being with me couldn't possibly end with a good outcome, but before I could continue such negative thoughts, I could hear him getting ready to step into the room.

"Shit," I mumbled, realizing I still had the cigarette in my hand, not even close to being finished. I hated wastin' them. Lighting it out with the ash tray, I would leave it there as I waved my hand in the air, hoping the smell wouldn't be too strong.

Oh, who the fuck was I kidding.

Even in this hot weather, Kasuka came out of the bathroom wearing a long, black sleeved shirt, a beanie hat that hid all of his hair, and sunglasses that resembled my own. His jeans were long and cut up in random spots, and I had to hold myself back before I jumped him into an embrace. Was I really so damn perverted and horny all the time?

_Chill_, Shizuo.

Even so, it worried me that he was wearing the long sleeved shirt in this heat.

"Are you going to be okay wearing that…?"

"Huh?" Kasuka looked down at himself and back up to me with a tilt of his head, "Wearing what? You told me to be in disguise. Wait, is that _smoke_ I smell?"

I ignored his last question as I nodded, "I know, I just don't want you to have some sort of… I dunno, heat stroke or whatever. It isn't exactly winter right now, ya know?"

He shrugged me off as he came over, looking down at the ash tray and giving me an eyeful of disapproval. I grinned sheepishly at him, hoping that would be enough to not start a full on conversation on how "bad" it was that I was a smoker. He brushed me off, walking past me to the other nightstand, grabbing for his phone and looking through his messages. I heard him curse under his breath, something he rarely did but I guess I was having some sort of influence on him.

"What's wrong?" I asked, tilting my head as I grabbed for the sheets, pulling them off the bed and rolling them into a ball. These would have to be washed as soon as we came back home.

"My manager," he responded, and that was all I needed to know until he continued, "He wants me to do an autograph signing with my co-star."

"That girl from your drama?"

What I really meant to ask was, "_That bitch from your drama that is only doing well because of you_?" but I tried my best not to let my mouth run off.

Am I fucking nice, or what?

He nodded, lying on the bare mattress as he groaned, but his face was emotionless as ever as he replied, "Yes. Her. I don't like her, you know. It's just the media trying to make up pointless rumors."

I knew he was saying this all to reassure me, but it still made me want to punch the wall. It wasn't his fault that the tabloids wanted to make a huge fuss over Kasuka and his possible dating life, even if everything they were making up was ridiculous bull shit to the core.

While it annoyed the living hell inside of me and made me rage inside, I leaned over the bed, placing my lips on his. He accepted quickly, bringing his arms up to wrap them around my neck, and I could feel his tongue poke mine, causing a groan to build up in my throat. It began to become a bit _too_ heated when I could feel his fingers pulling the back of my shirt up, and it took all of me to break us apart, leaving him in a mess. He stared up at me seductively, and while I wanted to take him right then and there, I simply grinned, leaving the room, but not before I could hear another quiet curse escape his lips.

Shit, I really _was_ becoming an influence.

†††

Eventually, we made it past the traffic of people in Ikebukuro. I fuckin' hated coming to town at this time of day. Large amounts of the sweaty, disgusting population made my eyes burn to look and be around with. How many times I've had to hide my face of horror at the fact that the people around me weren't wearing deodorant was beyond me. I had to keep aware, though. The flea could pop out at any minute, but it seemed like he wasn't around.

_Yet_.

I could see the excitement in Kasuka's eyes through his shades as we entered my favorite grocery store, the one that never ran out of milk, and I swear I heard a gasp that he tried to hide.

_Adorable_.

"Can I look for the stuff? What do we need?" he asked, his voice the definition of enthusiasm, and I couldn't help but grin.

"Sure," I chuckled, grabbing for a cart, "We need bread, eggs, hmm.. Whatever else you want, I guess."

I usually never ate at home, and if I did, it was pretty much anything and whatever I could find. If there was only a can of peas, you'd best bet your ass I'd eat them and not give a single complaint against it. Convenience stores were my best friend whenever Tom and I had to do a quick patrol to look for people in the night and I wasn't the type to really have a problem with it.

I had been learning how to cook better for Kasuka's sake, but that was a secret I would take with me to my grave.

Like _hell_ would he know about that.

"Okay," he nodded, adjusting his glasses as he looked at the aisles, "I'll get the bread."

Watching him make his way to pause at each aisle had already started to make me laugh, but I tried to hold it in so I wouldn't make him feel bad. His manager probably did all the grocery shopping for him or something, so I couldn't really blame him. Once he past the aisle with the bread and instead entered the aisle that was meant for frozen foods, a brief laugh escaped me, and I quickly rushed over to place a hand on his shoulder.

"It's in the next one," I smiled, pointing with my thumb. His face flushed for a second, nodding once in silence and going in the direction for the bread. He came back holding it up as if it was the damn golden globe award and I practically lost it. He tilted his head after placing it in the cart, which I had to adjust so it wouldn't get smushed, and I could tell even through his shades that he wanted me to shut the fuck up.

I obliged.

The rest of the items took a bit longer than expected for him to retrieve them. During the times he seemed more than lost, I tried to help him but he wouldn't give a rat's ass to my offers. At one point I wanted to get the hell out of there already and suggested he tell me what he wanted so I could look for them, and he simply waved his hand at me, telling me to shush.

The things I deal with for love, really.

"Well, an hour isn't too bad. I think the employee came over 'cause he thought we were tryin' to steal, though," I groaned, glad it was all over and done with. Kasuka looked over at me as we walked on the sidewalk that lead to my apartment, bumping his shoulder into my arm, teasing, "Well, you _do_ give off that kind of vibe."

I turned my head over to him, adjusting the grocery bags in my arms, frowning, "What the heck do you mean by tha-"

I couldn't finish my sentence from the loud scream we heard from the distance. I knew for a fact what it was for, and adjusting the bags on my arms, I grabbed Kasuka's hand, making a run for it.

"I-It's Kasuka! Senpai!" fangirls screamed, running behind us. How the _fuck_ were they so fast? You'd swear all of them were in track or some shit.

"Shi..Shizuo," Kasuka said worriedly, trying to keep up. At this point I was almost dragging him along since we had to dash quicker than the girls.

Hearing a crowd gather behind us, in the distance I could see a large truck and it seemed like the only opportunity we could take to find a way to hide from them. Sliding past it, the truck had thankfully continued to park backwards, and it gave us enough time to keep out of sight as we hid in an alley nearby. Pushing Kasuka against the wall, I concealed him with my body, glancing over to the opening of the alley to see the fan girls run past us in attempt to finding him. We waited silently until their screams became fainted, and I sighed deeply out of relief.

"How in the hell did they even know it was you?" I groaned, catching my breath with him.

"I don't know," he mumbled, wiping the sweat from his forehead and taking off his shades to look at me apologetically.

"No," I reassured, shaking my head before he could say anything, "Don't be sorry."

"But, Shizuo-"

"It's okay," I smiled, shrugging lightly. "Not like it's your fault. Besides, we did what we had to do right?" I glanced down at the groceries, glad they were still intact.

Kasuka nodded slowly, and it was then that I noticed how close we were. I could feel his breath against my face, and seeing him up this close was nothing new, but it was always interesting to notice the little bits of his facial features. Raising my free hand, the grocery bags rustled down my arm, my fingers unable to help trace the lines from his chin to his cheeks. He eyed me carefully, and I could tell he was unsure of whether or not to move away or allow me to continue. When he didn't say anything, I glanced down to his mouth where his lips looked so damn inviting, and I stopped thinking rationally as I pushed mine onto his, feeling the warmth of his tongue caresses my own. His hand squeezed mine as the kiss deepened with no time for air, and hearing his moan as I suckled on the tip of his tongue made me want to rip off our clothes and fuck as if we didn't care who saw us. However, it was like he could read my mind because he pushed me away gently, our saliva breaking and leaving a bit of drool on the side of his mouth. When I used my finger to wipe it away, he turned his head, speaking softly, "Not outside…"

I blinked, coming back into reality and realizing exactly where we were. No one had seen us, thankfully, but I was sure he felt ashamed due to my actions. I sighed softly, adjusting my erection before I could step away from him, and he was doing the same.

"I'm sorry," I said, finding it my turn to apologize.

"Don't be," he shook his head, repeating my words. It caused me to smile a bit at him, and I wanted to grab for his hand, but that wasn't a good idea and I left mine hanging there by my side. Watching him wear his shades again, he went in to hug me gently, but before I could wrap my arms around his, he let go, already making his way for the entrance to the alley. Motioning his hand for me to follow, I walked with him, checking to see if any fan girls had been waiting for him. Standing outside of the alley, I suddenly had a strange urge to turn around as if someone was there, but it was empty.

"Shizuo?" Kasuka called, tilting his head. "Everything okay?"

"Hm? Oh, yeah. I just thou- Nevermind," I shook my head, rubbing the back of it in confusion. Deciding it was best to shake off the weird vibes, I turned back to him and we continued on our way back to my apartment in total silence.

I knew he wasn't mad, but that little _stunt_ we just did was something that was totally prohibited. At least, not in public where anyone could find out. It wouldn't ruin just him; it would ruin the both of us.

When we entered the apartment, Kasuka grabbed the grocery bags from me, saying, "I'll go put these away."

Nodding once, I glimpsed down at the ground to find mail.

"Strange," I mumbled. I had the small box opening at the door for mail, but truthfully, I never received anything other than bills. There was no address to it, not even mine, which only meant someone had delivered it personally. Unsure of the situation, I ripped open the envelope, but there were no letters inside.

Instead, what was inside were pictures.

Pictures of Kasuka and I in the alley way, kissing.

My heart stopped, and I almost forgot how to breathe. Turning the pictures over, my life crashed down and I could feel the demon in me stir inside as I read the note scribbled on the back in neat, black ink –

"_To the stupid Protozoan,_

_Won't these look nice in your scrapbook? Or maybe in magazines?_

_With hatred,_

_Izaya."_

* * *

><p>Oh no. Looks like someone found out.<br>Gotta say I'm interested to bring in my favorite character. Hopefully it won't take me a million years to write the next chapter. Oops.

Ah, if there are mistakes, I apologize. This is my ten thousandth time editing this and it's already 2 am. Little to say, I'm exhausted and just wanted to upload this already.

Please review!


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